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I was having a day. Finally the end of the day rolled around and we had our semimonthly developer book club meeting. One of the devs wrote this heading into our Notion document and then asked Notion AI to complete the section. It really turned my day around.

A screenshot of Notion AI writing "Why We Cannot Read This Book to Save Our Lives"
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About the same time I learned that if you type "(turkey)" into Microsoft Teams, you get a cooked, headless, dancing turkey. The comic absurdity level increased.

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Then we started installing some of the seemingly limitless and absurd "apps" available on Microsoft Teams. Most make a dancing turkey look downright reasonable.

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"Hey everyone, Slack is eating our lunch. We need to do something."

"What if we made Teams into an APPLICATION PLATFORM?!"

"GENIUS! But we need some apps at launch. Get your team on it!"

And thus was born some of the most absurd product meetings ever devised by humankind.

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Microsoft helpfully produced a lot of content for developers interested in their Teams app platform...

A diagram of "Microsoft Teams Architecture" that kind of speaks for itself. It's hilariously complex.
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In conclusion, we've entered the dystopian technology endgame and we're all doomed. Go outside today.

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Microsoft Teams Focus Mode™

This feature randomly turns off notifications for indeterminate periods of time.

It cannot be turned off or configured in any way.

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My 8-year-old son, upon my realization that he doesn't have school tomorrow, "You still have to go to work. Too bad."

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"Great poets have come before us, but we can still be the poets of individual lives."

Lewis Hyde

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